Take That, 'Greatest Hits Live 2019', SSE Hydro, Glasgow. Sat 20th April 2019.

Before I get onto the main act, I'll start with the support. Dressed in Converse trainers and a sharp suit, hair quiffed tall, I could be describing the Tenth Doctor but this was Rick Astley, the Eighties legend, who made a comeback a few years ago with a couple of strong albums and singles. He's comfortable on the big stage, has a strong voice and a memorable back catalogue. He did himself proud for the time he had (just under an hour). The worst I could say was the font of his logo is dull and his backing singers looked like they were dressed by the costume designer from seventies Top of the Pops.

This was Take That's Greatest Hits Tour, celebrating thirty years in the business. The audience was predominantly female, over forty and well up for a party. They lasted well which speaks wonders to the benefits of HRT. I'm kidding. This was Glasgow. It was alcohol that fuelled them tonight.

Gary, Howard and Mark gave us two hours without a break trawling through their best tunes, reworking a few to better suit them as a threesome, bringing along the usual dancers, updating the costumes and adding a few gimmicks, like a trio of stationary motorbikes that steered from side to side. Not that exciting really.

The stage was dominated by a sphere that doubled as a performance area and a screen (and an occasional Pac Man lookalike, but there were no power pellets so the band were safe - shame because I would have enjoyed it if the band turned ultraviolet and were chased around to the classic 'wagga wagga' tune).

The concert was good but I felt it wasn't their best. Gary's energy seemed off at the start, his voice growing stronger as the show went on. Howard was better than usual, more confident in leading a couple of songs, the best of the three when it came to the dance moves. Mark had an odd moustache, the kind only a mother could love and even then would still want him to shave it off because it makes him look stupid. Bits of the show looked cheap, with dodgy fizz fireworks and low-level grill flames. When Lulu joined them on Relight My Fire, she wasn't the atomic bomb she usually is. Her voice was lost in the sound mix. She still has a great presence on stage though.

I think the problem was the band have set the bar for their stage productions so high I expected better. This show not only didn't quite match their previous efforts it felt short of what other performers are doing: Kiss's lights and pyro drama, Kylie's screen vistas and choreography, McCartney's musicality are all better. If they want to last another ten years, they'll need to lift their game again.

So, overall, a good show but not a great show.

Setlist

Greatest Day
It Only Takes a Minute (Tavares cover)
These Days
Could It Be Magic (Barry Manilow cover)
Everything Changes
Out of Our Heads
A Million Love Songs
Sure
Love Ain't Here Anymore
Spin

Cry (Sigma cover)
Said It All
How Deep Is Your Love? (Bee Gees cover)

Patience
The Flood
Back for Good
Get Ready for It
Everlasting
Giants
Shine
Never Forget
Relight My Fire (Dan Hartman cover) (with Lulu)
Babe
Pray
Rule the World

Marc Maron, 'A Few Parts Of The World Tour', Vicar St, Dublin. Thurs 11th April 2019

So I did this thing where I went to Ireland to see a comedian. I didn't laugh out loud but my shoulders jiggled a couple of times. For me that's a win. He was very funny in a curmudgeonly way. If you haven't heard of him, WTF, he knows and doesn't care. We're all going to die eventually anyway so what does it matter in the grand scheme.

Vicar St in Dublin is an odd venue (it's actually on Thomas Street for one thing). The seating plan has these tiny round tables with four satellite stools attached to each one. They are all crammed into the floor space leaving hardly any room between them unless you're as small as a leprechaun (yeah, I went there, I'm not proud). The sell out crowd are all perched on these toadstools getting backache (asking for a friend, how much do leprechauns pay their chiropractors?), unless you were lucky enough to be sitting at the side or in the balcony. On the stage, Marc is on a stool too, although his is taller, because he's American and he's more important (not really, he just likes to sit while he works).

He's got his shtick to go through and it's a process. He has material prepared but is professional enough to go off topic and bring us back. He's been doing it for thirty-five years after all. He's got a grouchy moustache and floppy hair, now greying, and he has his problems but he's working on them. He reckons he's 85% woke. He's just got to push back his vagina brain back a few levels and he'll be fine. His final bit about US veep Mike Pence at the end of the world ties up a lot of the night's themes and I'm pleased us need geeks will finally inherit the Earth, even if it is fucked. He also makes a valid point about all those fundamental Christians in positions of power accelerating the Apocalypse just so they can meet Jesus on his return. Now it all makes sense.

Good show. Boomer lives!

Glengarry Glen Ross - Theatre Royal, Glasgow. Mon 8th Apr 2019.

The poster says it's an extraordinary experience. Based on tonight's performances, the adjective is prefixed by five letters too many.

Mark Benton is fine in the Jack Lemmon role, but the others mostly don't measure up to the script. Nigel Harman certainly ain't no Pacino. His big angry scene, bringing out the big C word, evoked as many titters as gasps from the audience when it should have felt like a gut punch. Maybe his unconvincing New York drawl weakened its impact. Maybe he just wasn't up to the role.

I know it's unfair to compare the film to the play but I'd rather dig out my Bluray than have to sit through this middling pish again.

My compliments to the set designer.

(On reflection, the set wasn't that special either).